Ignacio de Loyola

Fire.

Passion.

Stubborn.

Soldier.

Knight.

Love life.

Lady.

Journal.

Battles.

Spiritual exercises.

Companions.

Discernment.

Consolation.

Desolation.

Give up.

Sleepless.

Voice within.

Morning star.

Lies.

Truth.

Light.

Never look down.

Sinner.

Soldier.

Saint.
Ignacio de Loyola.
That was just the intro. Hehehe!
I cried during the movie, not just because I heard someone else cried so I can allow myself to cry too, but because I had what Ignacio experienced ~ the life changing rock bottom event, the questioning, the doubts, the truth and the light.
Just like Ignacio’s rock bottom moment after getting injured from the war and his brother becoming the hero instead of himself as he dreamed, I too hit rock bottom after being heartbroken.

I didn’t know it then that it was God’s way of waking me up for a greater mission.
Just like Ignacio, I also asked myself countless times why something so bad and sad happened until I couldn’t answer it and life has to go on. 

But something has changed. 

I have changed. 
Just like Ignacio, I have also embarked on a journey of getting to know The Father more and His plans for me.

Just like Ignacio in becoming a beggar for Jesus- giving the alms and food he received to the brothers and sisters in need and discussing the spiritual exercises for help in discernment over the hard questions in life to those hungry for Jesus, I took it upon myself to make any person coming my way to feel God’s love through me ~ whether by a simple sincere hello to another’s day, a warm hug or just being courteous. 
Just like Ignacio, there are times even at present that I doubt myself, and get affected when the enemy tries to trick me with his lies and guilt tripping over my past mistakes.
Just like Ignacio, I struggled and had a difficult time forgiving myself.

Until the Lord made it clear to me… He loves me so much, believes in me and my goodness so much, that I should simply accept His love and share it to others.
Just like Ignacio, I refuse to look down and be under the enemy’s shadow when I could be in the light with Jesus!

Only when I had chosen to accept his love and our mission, did I gain new eyes ~ the eyes of faith. 
Just like Ignacio, I see things differently now ~ relationships over money, patience and peace over anger and control issues, and truth over lies.

Well I’m not a saint like Ignacio so I sometimes still struggle over these issues. But when I pray and remember His love for me, I don’t want to do anything which will break our friendship.
With this great news of God’s love, I cannot help but just talk about it and share it to others. I hope one day I won’t need to speak about God’s love because hopefully my actions day to day would be a reflection of God’s love.

Just like Ignacio, the fire burns within me brightly. And yes, with the help of the Holy Spirit, I will set the world on fire.

Thank you Jesus for the fire in my heart.
“But if I say, “I will not mention his word

    or speak anymore in his name,”

his word is in my heart like a fire,

    a fire shut up in my bones.

I am weary of holding it in.”

Jeremiah 20:9
As a way to keep my fire burning for Jesus and always challenging myself to be “more” for his greater glory, I have this prayer to remind me which I want to share with you too:
“Disturb us, Lord, when

We are too well pleased with ourselves,

When our dreams have come true

Because we have dreamed too little,

When we arrived safely

Because we sailed too close to the shore.
Disturb us, Lord, when

With the abundance of things we possess

We have lost our thirst

For the waters of life;

Having fallen in love with life,

We have ceased to dream of eternity

And in our efforts to build a new earth,

We have allowed our vision

Of the new Heaven to dim.
Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly,

To venture on wider seas

Where storms will show your mastery;

Where losing sight of land,

We shall find the stars.
We ask You to push back

The horizons of our hopes;

And to push into the future

In strength, courage, hope, and love.”
attributed – sir francis drake -1577

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